Finding a Way to Rejoice Always...

Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. - 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18

In June 2013, Alberta experienced one of its worst floods in decades. Towards the end of the June, we had an Art Vocabulary of the Soul retreat at King’s Fold Retreat Centre in the area near the flooding. Ghost River, a smaller river than the two that caused so much damage in Calgary, reached its peak the day before we were to come. King’s Fold’s bridge over the river remained intact and the water level started receding before our arrival, but it was still much higher than normal. I was sharing that weekend on the saturation of God, the Holy Spirit. He, as the Living Water, is not content to just trickle through us only in the places we allow him, he desires to saturate, to fill, and to renew us. The flood was a perfect metaphor of God’s untamed, saturating power. I took our group down as far as we could go to look out over the flooded valley. We stood on at the edge of a cliff, overlooking the water, and we contemplated God’s saturation upon us… this painting is what we saw.Floodwaters- Ghost River

The next morning I went down to the river edge again. The waters had receded nearly to their usual boundaries. The devastation of the valley stretched before me – uprooted trees, mud churned up, piles of broken branches and trees pushed up against the few remaining trees. And this thought occurred to me: when God saturates me with himself, I will be changed. He will uproot that in me which needs uprooting. How willing am I really to go through the cleansing?

I finally finished this painting this last month. I struggled with it, and I struggled within me. I didn’t like the painting, but most of all I think I really don’t like facing the ugliness inside of me that God is uprooting, and redeeming. I felt this aching inside - the need to let go, to trust God with all of me.

As I have been letting my arm heal, (the surgery in December was on my upper right arm) I have not painted as much. Instead, God gave me a melody, and then later the words. It is a song I can cry with. It allows me to grieve over what I cannot control, but feel deeply: whether it is my own sin, my illness, or a friend’s suffering, or even the calamity of flooding and homes destroyed as in the flood of 2013. The song is a lament.

In the song I say: I will choose to rejoice, regardless of the circumstances, I’ll trust in you. This “rejoice” is not so much about being happy, it is about choosing to not complain and think of all that I lack. Instead I will choose to be thankful, grateful for my God who walks beside me and carries me through the difficult times of life. Joy is trusting God with my life – and finding my peace and rest in him. This is the choice I want to make, I don’t always make it, but he is always faithful, with me in the struggle, even the struggles within myself. And his arms are always open ready to embrace me as I turn back to him with trust and love.

The words of the song are below:

I will sing to the Lord, sing though my heart is aching, sing alleluia to my Lord.
With my heart I will sing, sing though my heart is grieving; have mercy on me, O Lord.

I will trust in the Lord, with all my heart, my soul, my mind, I will trust in you.
I will choose to rejoice, regardless of the circumstances I’ll trust in you.

Singing alleluia! Praise the name of Jesus, alleluia, amen.
Singing alleluia! Praise the name of Jesus, alleluia, amen.

Painting: King's Fold/Flood waters Ghost River